If you were not afraid to fail, what would you try doing today? Fear is the most limiting factor to success. Believe me, I speak from experience. The Breadcrumbz are so much more to me than characters in stories. They represent different facets of both my life and my daughters’ lives. Their stories and lessons are drawn from actual experiences of my girls and how I interpreted and dealt with sometimes sensitive situations. Putting this out there for the world to critique is incredibly frightening for me.
Discovering the courage to do this has been a long process. During my initial launch of the website, one of my daughters developed a chronic medical condition and I found myself unable to put anything else at the top of my priority list. The many nights I lay awake worrying about a future for a dream that I had no idea how to realize, was replaced by worry over doctor’s appointments and medications and missed school. As a result, I found myself becoming distant from what I had spent years building. The distance from my dream felt so reassuring, it was like I had buried a bone that I could dig up when my appetite returned. The problem was I started forgetting not only where the bone was buried, but why it was so precious to me in the first place. I convinced myself that there were other dreams worth pursuit, less risky ones that would not shatter my confidence if they were not realized. Those pursuits were definitely not as frightening to me, but they were also not even close to satisfying. I knew I had to get back to what I had started, even if it meant starting over.
Finding my way back seemed to take forever. Once you step away from a project which completely engulfed you for years, it’s like you don’t know where to jump back in. The irony is that I needed to follow a trail of breadcrumbs to get back to my Breadcrumbz. Going through my materials was overwhelming and incredibly gratifying. In the course of developing my characters, my site, my brand…I had developed so much content. I realized that what I tried to show the world in my first attempt was too much. I tossed confetti into the air hoping that some particle might stick, when many valuable pieces seemed to float away.
So here I am, again, trying to attempt something completely absurd…hoping to achieve the impossible. I need to gain a following. This is my new trail, starting with my failure and moving forward. I hope you will join me.